20T: Whaaaat? Did that just happen?

Ok so where to begin..

Friday Night was Ladies Night! And I went.. I almost chickened out several times but I went!

Worried about what to wear, I tried on every single outfit I had that could be worn at a club. I finally settled on a coral orange mini dress that hugged in all the right places and made me stand out. I was definitely happy with my choice knowing I would make a statement! With the outfit done I hopped in the shower for a spa like treatment (exfoliating, shaving, lavishing, conditioningI also put baby oil all over my legs for a smooth and shiny finish! ) Next I blew my hair out straight and added in blonde extensions. Really Hott!! So I finished my makeup and put on my dress, am ready to leave when I notice that the oil hadn’t been rubbed in enough on the top of my legs and I had stains on my dress on the back!! I was so upset! Needless to say I couldn’t get them out and had to change.. so I ended up with a mini black dress that had to back and the front pluged to my weist.. all in all I should have gone with this numba in the beginning.. true not a bright color, but damn I looked fierce…

So I met up with my gf and we headed over to her friends, as if I wasn’t worried about the night enough it turns out her friend lives right beside my extremely string uncle and aunt (who love telling on me btw!) Luckily I don’t think they ever saw me… anyways so we drank a bit there I met the girls we would be hanging out with and I was totally stoked! I figured I had made it and I found new friends! Anyways we got to the club and it was a pretty good night, but somehow I was bombed, I had three drinks over the perios of like 5 hours but I was bombed! Anyways luckily I had these girls who were protecting me from all the sleeze bags but not from them… haha I ended up making out with one of them!!! Which I know every girl does but.. I dono the next day it didn’t sit well with me.. I felt like I had lowered my own personal standards.. but we’ll get back to that thought… So anyways all in all the club was pretty awesome, we danced with a lot of guys (I tried pushing them away I really was there just for my girls!) A bouncer actually had to kick two guys out for me I find out later since they were stalking me and grabbing me (once again I was bombed..) but a good time had by all.

The next day we had my hubbies buddies stag and doe.. I was supposed to hang out with my gf from cali but she ditched me all weekend and then called me yesterday to say she was to depressed to go out. (our other friend already told me she hung out with her both days…) anyways! So the stag an doe.. my next time seeing actor-friend and ready for the game on! Figuring what to wear again.. I didn’t want to look over dressed but I didn’t want to blend in either.. I ended up in crock heals, a brown mini skirt, and a purple top. I curled my hair for the first time and looked hot (naturally! LOL)

So we get there and the 1^st guy e see was Joel, he just looks at me and goes “whoa” then cocks his head at hubby.. it was quite funny. He gave me this big hug and my hubby left me to get drinks and tickets. Then the rest of the guys came over to introduce themselves to me hahaha and all ended up giving me hugs.. I didn’t think I looked that diff with curly hair but whatever… so the night went on we were all drinking and hanging out actor-friend comes over and sits with me and Joe. Playing it cool I kind of ignor him as he tries to add in to Joes and my conversation. (we were looking around looking for potential hook-ups for him) and actor-friend chirps that he’s now into married women and stares at me. Like how cocky and stupid is that? I just said oh yea? And continued my conver… not to say I wasn’t intrigued but what he said or what he meant, and not like Joe would catch on.. ahh if he wasn’t so fricken hot and those damn eyes… anyways we were all dancing later (I kept my distance from actor-friend to his demise) anyways It was like 1:30 and I walked out of the bathroom only to have actor-friend grab me, pin me up against the wall, and start kissing me. I was so shoked by the boldness, afraid of getting caught, it was so heat.. it more ways then one.. anyways we heard footsteps and broke apart only to see Joe look at both of us and ask if everythings ok.. haha I died on the spot and murmered st and left the two of them chatten.. I went out the backstairs to run smack into Joel who was also drunk.. He was wearing this hat and put in on me we were jokin around up to this point and then hes like wow you look amazing in that hat.. no one looks good in that hat.. then the conversation went to all the things he could do to me and I quote “make me burn” he picked me up and sat me on the back of the truck and had his arms on both sides of my legs not letting me move or get down… anyways luckily my hubby and actor-friend and joe all came out right then and Joel backed off… but what the hell!? I was drunk but mad that I knew he was taken adv of that… anyways the boys decided we were going to go to a park around the corner… yea around the corner my ass.. we had to troup through a thick bush to get there, me in heals and a skirt, I wounded up with a million bites and scratches and Joel and actor-friend were both ”helping me” at every opportunity they saw… anyways after an eventless walk we stumbled into the park and hubby called a cab-van to take us all back to our place (there were 2 other guys with us) anyways I end up in the back with actor-friend beside me and Joel beside him.. I had already talked to actor-friend on our little “hike” about what was going on with Joel and he picked up the signals.. Joel was reaching behind him and caressing me, my hair, my butt, whatever he could touch and I couldn’t say a damn thing… I froze I didn’t know what to do! Anyways actor-friend was no help, I could see he was jelous and he just leaned forward and ignored it.

At home things didn’t go much better we were all hanging out when I went to lie down and pass out in the bedroom. Sure enough actor-friend and Joel and one of the other guys came in and were all chillen on the bed too (quite normal actually we’ve got a king and everyone loves chillen on it) the lights were off tho and Joels hands were going everywhere, up my skirt everything.. and I had actor-friend on the other side of me..

Anyways so that was bascally my night… so here are the conclusions.. I would never do anything with Joel, I’m not a random type a girl, and I am appalled at the fact that he would hit on his bff wife so hard.. True this is what actor-friend does but it’s different, we have a thing, feelings, and we’ve talked about it, not just some cheap drunken trick… anyways so I dono what to do about this Joel situation or even actor-friend..

But reflecting on my weekend I feel really slutty. Like a girl should be able to go out with her friends, hang out with her hubby have a good time and go home.. instead I feel guilty about everything because something unplanned always happens and I dono how to turn the events once in motion. I feel terrible… my hubby deserves better than this, and I don’t want to be treated like a skank… on the other half I wish my hubby would pay more attention to me when were out and maybe this shit wouldn’t happen.. I mean its obv his friends notice his lack of attention and presence..

However I’m not about to promise no more clubs and actor-friend.. man I am so screwed up!